Saturday, March 14, 2009

Thinking about you

It is so hard to not think about you my dear little boy. I feel your pressence around me every day and feel your strength. Everyone says it gets easier and I know it does eventually but right now it does not feel like it does. You are in my thoughts day in and day out. When I watch Television it reminds me of you. When I go to the store I see something that I want to get for you but I know you are not here. I do not want to wash the shirt I wore when you left us. You are never forgotten and are always in my heart. Everyday I have to take a few moments of silence at my desk when I look at your pictures. I still cry at a moments notice.


ski said...

Dont let people tell you "it gets easier as time goes by." No, it doesnt, you just learn how to deal. The hurt never goes away, it just dulls a little. If you dont want to wash the shirt you wore, dont. I still have the gown I wore when my son passed. I never washed it. It still has that smell. I still hold it and cry (years later). You do what you need to get through your day. Its ok to be mad, angry, upset, pissed off and any other emotion you feel the need to feel. If you need anything, please just leave me a comment on my site and I will do what I can to help you walk this journey. Know youre not alone.


Drayke's Mom said...

Saturday evening I was at a Border's book store and completely lost control while paying for some DVD's. I went with a friend to check out the sale they were having on DVD's and the first rack I saw was DVD's for babies & infants. I couldnt stop crying for almost an hour.

The pain never goes away. All I can think of is Drayke. He is NEVER out of my thoughts.

tiffanysullivan said...

I know how hard it is I lost Brianna in December and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her. If either of you need to talk to someone let me know.

Anonymous said...

In addition to your very strong & supportive community of friends and loved ones, (as cheesy as this might sound) you might benefit from the "death and dying" forum on Craigslist. I go there to read and share and the online community is very supportive. It helps when you feel like no one will understand - people there have gone through similar situations.

I am so sorry for your loss.